girls with guitars on the internet

 remember when Fred broke up with Sally

and she wrote a song about him

then posted it on facebook

and we all laughed

and made sadface emojis,

but other people said stuff like,

‘babe, that’s so beautiful’

‘oh hun, I feel for you’

‘this is sad news, big hugs xxx’

sad face emojis, hearts and something, something.

We giggled some more, and Fred hid from the internet for days.

 

Funny story,

Fred broke up with Mary the other day,

she wrote a sad song too,

posted it on all the socials,

it’s everywhere.

Fred hasn’t seen it yet,

but I have, and I groaned and laughed

keeping my sad emojis to myself.

I’m going to tell him,

‘You'd better stop dating girls with guitars’

then I’ll try not to laugh too much, 

well, not for too long anyway.

Ha ha.

But then I wrote this poem,

because I think there's too many fine lines that blur,

when you whine about your ex

post it on the net,

and make a small profit, be it monetary,

smug revenge or just bad shade thrown from a dusty guitar,

and a sing-song mouth that sugar wouldn't melt in.

So, I wrote my own song, without music,

that I'll post on the internet too.

I hope I don't piss those sulky songbirds off, 

because I don’t want the laughing gods

to take my laugh off me,

...it wouldn’t be a merry Christmas and a happy new year

without my snorts and giggles.

I hope Fred likes my poem, and it makes him laugh too,

God knows he's earnt it,

and he might even try to sing it too,

but with no guitars, I promise...

especially since it's on the internet now.